GIRLS SHOULD ACCEPT THEMSELVES AS A SEXUAL BEING

In order for women to be sexual and enjoy sex, they must accept that they are sexual beings. If you do not acknowledge this, or deny it, then sexual pleasure and happiness cannot be achieved. A woman's hormones, to a certain degree, control her actions. When our body feels it is ready for sex, to reproduce, it tells the brain to seek out sex. When this happens, we think about sex more often and with a greater urgency, we become sexual beings. While women's sex drives are often cyclic, as the result of their menstrual cycle, they too become horny and are driven to seek out sex.

It is not unusual for a woman or teenager to complain that when she caresses her vulva and clitoris that she does not experience sexual pleasure, perhaps feeling nothing at all. A likely cause for this is that her brain is not primed for sex, which means it is not ready to process sexual stimulation. When the brain is not ready for sex, the clitoris IS just an extra piece of tissue. A woman must accept that she just cannot place her hand between her legs and automatically bring herself to orgasm. Orgasm is not just a mechanical process. For the most part it is a mental and chemical process. The brain controls the release of chemicals that make orgasm possible. If the chemicals, hormones, are not available, even mental thought may not be enough to get your body ready for sex and sexual pleasure.

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ARE YOU NOT AFRAID TO BE NAKED

Although the scale is a good indicator of how much you weigh, it is by no means a good indicator of how fat or slim you really are. When you climb on a scale to measure yourself, you are not simply measuring fat. You are measuring your body as a whole and that means fat, muscle, organs, bone and water — everything put together. What you eat, what you wear and whether you measure on the carpet or tile as well as the time of day can all influence the reading.
The ideal women's body shape would be one where the waist is slim and the hips are slightly wider and proportionate. Women who carry a lot of weight in their waist are at risk of heart disease and should aim at slimming down their waist.

Use the waist-to-hip ratio to determine if your body is in optimal or bad shape. To determine this, you will need to measure the circumference of your hips as well as the circumference of your waist in inches. To calculate your waist-to-hip ratio, divide your waist measurement by your hip measurement and record your score. An ideal number would be a ratio of under 0.8. Take this reading on a regular basis, such as once a week and track your score.

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*THE COLOR EFFECT ON GIRLS

Women are attracted to men wearing the color blue. And why wouldn't we be? Men who frequently wear blue are "stable, faithful, constant and always there." The blue guy is a fantastic candidate for a long-term relationship -- someone who's dependable, momogomous and can match his own clothes.

Of all the colors, red is the most sensual. But, wear red with caution. "Red is the color of sex and power," Red adds an element of excitement and attracts two types of men - men interested in sex, and men attracted to powerful women. Sure, you'll probably have to fend off a lot of freaks, but you could also end up attracting a guy that isn't threatened by the fact that you make a bigger salary.

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TRY THIS POSITION TONIGHT

The Swan
The "swan" is a great way to stimulate your partner's penis and testicles when you've been roaming around his other erogenous zones. Imagine your thumb and fingers coming together in the shape of the old-fashioned shadow puppet

-- the "swan." This is great for gently clasping the testicles between the beak-like shape formed by your fingers. Gently pull them a little. Now open your fingers up again and swirl them around his inner thighs. Then stop and stroke his perineum. Next, apply the swan as an upwards movement from the base of his penis, pulling his foreskin (if he has one) gently up over his glans. If he's circumcised it is better to gently flutter your fingertips down the shaft of his penis. Now clasp the base of his shaft and gently and rhythmically "massage" the base of it, pulling upwards only if he wants that stimulation. Circumcised men vary tremendously in the degree of stimulation they need -- some have deadened sensitivity and need a much firmer touch while others are very sensitive. Always ask your lover how he wants you to touch him.

This massage technique can be used on a man or woman. Get your lover to lie on her back while you warm some massage oil in your hands. Kneel astride her thighs and lean forward, placing both hands just below her neckline and above her breastbone. Start a slow, smooth path with your oiled hands outward and down either side of her ribcage, just skimming the edges of her breasts. Now slowly and sensuously draw your hands in to meet at the navel. Pause a moment before recommencing the outward sweep of the figure "8" down around her outer hips, your hands meeting over her pubis. Gently kneed her pubis and even allow your fingers to wander over her genitals before starting the sweeping motion back up to her navel and onwards. Repeat the Erotic "8" movement as many times as you wish.

This is so named because many Thai masseuses encourage skin-on-skin contact during a massage with their clients to tempt them into asking for "extras." The Thai body massage consists of gently rubbing your naked body over your lover's bare skin. It is ideal if you are both kissing, with one lying slightly on top of the other. Rise up on your hands and gently swish your chest and abdomen over your lover's body. This feels particularly erotic on a woman's breasts?skin against skin. If you have the arm strength you may also move your abdomen and hips across your lover's body.

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WHY YOU SHOULD TAKE OFF YOUR PANTY

. Explore the pleasures of the senses. Touch can be a powerful sex enhancer. Loving touch causes a number of hormones to surge, including oxytocin and endorphins. Just thinking of being touched can cause an oxytocin surge, creating the desire for more. Massage is one special way of giving pleasure to your lover.

Wear sexy undies. Most women save these delights for special occasions. What would you like to be caught in if you happen to be peeling in front of Tom Cruise, Mel Gibson or Sean Connery? It wouldn't be the utilitarian white cotton bra and the rarely-matching frayed panties, I'm sure. And don't just wear sexy underthings for him. Use it to help enhance your own sexy self-image.

Share a bedtime story. And I'm not talking about Green Eggs and Ham! Read aloud to each other, or pick out your favorite juicy part and read solo.

Fantasize. Fantasy is a wonderful way to recharge your sexual "batteries." The sexier we feel throughout the day, the better -- and no doubt, more frequent -- the sex will be. Take pleasure in daydreams. Hold onto those sexy or romantic thoughts just a bit longer. Treat yourself to their sensuality. Make it part of your life. Men think about sex at least XXX times a day. This preoccupation allows a man to stay in the "ready, willing and able" mode. Priming the pump allows a woman to enjoy the quicker response time and greater spontaneity that men have always been teased about.

Lose that negative body image! Sex is between the ears. Most women place an inordinate burden on their self-esteem, due to poor body image -- and low self-esteem is not sexy. This can have a disastrous effect on a couple's sex life. Men generally are much less critical, and more accepting of their partner's bodies than they're given credit for. Nothing is more captivating to a man than a woman who feels sexy and acts with sexual confidence, regardless of her perceived imperfections.

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AMAZING SEX POSITION

These great sex positions will make your love life stronger (and potentially put out your lower back, so please make sure you're paid up on your health insurance before you try them).

• Ken and Barbie style - Neither partner is allowed to bend at the elbows or knees.
• Doggie style - The man attempts to do the impossible.
• Froggie style - Male and female partners in large spa. Male attempts to fertilise female using only the water as a transmission medium. For couples who don’t like each other much any more.
• Fish style - same as Froggie style, but neither partner may use their arms or legs.
• Mummy and Daddy Love Each Other Very Much, And Hug Each Other in A Special Way style - The only position in this list you won’t be embarrassed to tell the kids about when they're five.
• Style style - Sex with a Vogue Living editor.
• Crouch position - Each partner crouches down on the ground, then simultaneously leaps up, and attempts to couple whilst in mid-air.
• Couch position - Same as the crouch position, but starting at opposite ends of the living room couch.
• Ouch position - Usual outcome of the crouch position.
• Lazy Susan style - Susan goes to sleep.
• Russian style - Partners queue for hours for enough vodka to make each other look attractive.
• Nostrodamus sex - Any encounter that comes as a complete surprise.
• Osama Bin Laden’s position - If you know this position, please contact the FBI for your $25 million reward.
• Bank style - Screw the customers.
• Missionary position - Each partner kneels and prays.

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TRY SEX FANTASIES FOR GIRLS

Sex life feeling a bit stale? Well, there's one sexual organ most people neglect: the brain. And it's your passport back to Sexual Nirvana. Literally millions of us secretly use fantasies during masturbation, and some of us use them to achieve orgasm during sex. So why not own up to your favourites and act them out with your partner for what could be the lustiest sex you've had in years?

Fantasy 1: He's a virgin - and you're Mrs. Robinson
Why it appeals to you: It's a power game and 'forbidden' sex for both parties, which is always a guaranteed libido-lifter. What you'll need: A 'sexy secretary' outfit works for this one: a long pencil skirt, shirt unbuttoned to show off a push-up bra, stockings and high heels.
The action plan:
The trick to this one is to move very slowly at first. You're seducing him, and he's struggling - torn between ripping off your clothes and worrying about the consequences. (What will his mum say if she finds out? Is she really seducing him or is he reading too much into it?) Say you're going to make a drink for each of you, then lead him into the lounge with your drinks. He sits on the sofa, you sit on a chair opposite, crossing your legs and hitching your skirt up high. He's not sure where to look. Make general chit-chat (the sort of stuff you'd ask your son's friend, if you have/had a teenager), then take the conversation to another - saucier - level. Tell him you don't think your husband finds you attractive anymore. Ask him, Does he think you're attractive? What bits? Why? Let him squirm with embarrassment as he tries to be diplomatic - and tries to hide his erection.

At that point you say, You seem a little uncomfortable and move from the chair to sit beside him on the couch. Loosen the first two buttons of his shirt and rub the back of your hand against his exposed chest saying, Such soft skin. So unlike my husband's. As he squirms, undo the top few buttons of your shirt, take his hand and place it on your breast. Ask him if he likes that.

In between your lurid requests and actions, keep making small talk. Ask him if he's ever made love to a woman before. He'll squeak out a no. Ask him if he'd like to make love to you, and tell him it's okay - you won't tell. Ask him to take off your top and your bra. Tell him to touch your breasts and instruct him on how you like to be touched. Moan and sigh, but remember: You're still the grown-up - so not too out of control. Ask him to stand up in front of you and unzip his trousers. Admire his body, compliment it, say how hard it is, then give him exquisitely tortuous oral sex - stopping just short of orgasm.

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THE MYTH ABOUT BOYS

Myth. Sex produces instant adulthood.

Facts. In their desire to become adults quickly, some adolescents believe that engaging in adult activities (sexual intercourse, smoking, drinking alcohol, driving, etc.) will make them adults. With sex, it leads to two bad effects. It may push teenagers into situations they do not want — romantic commitments, pregnancies, sexually transmitted diseases. On the other hand, if teenagers feel these activities have actually made them fully mature, it may inhibit their growth and development in other areas.

Myth. Sex means love.

Facts. Young women are more likely to believe that love and sex go together. Teenagers may feel sexual advances indicate love and commitment and are very disappointed when this is not the case. Or they may feel that love (which is not necessary for sex) will be an inevitable outcome of having sexual intercourse. Young people often believe that if you have sex with someone, he or she will be more likely to love them. While it does happen at times, it more often leads to feelings of disappointment and possibly betrayal.

Myth. "No" means "Yes."

Facts. Many guys feel that they must take advantage of every sexual opportunity to prove their masculinity. In addition, they believe that most women who say "no" really mean "yes." As a result, "date rape" is very prevalent, though most cases go unreported.

In fear of offending the man, some women may actually smile while saying "no," giving him conflicting messages. Others find it extremely difficult to openly say "no" and wind up in passively squirming and retreating without saying anything. The most effective and assertive response to an unwanted sexual advance would be to say, "Although I like you, I definitely do not want to have sexual intercourse." This does not damage the fellow's ego, and it indicates her wishes clearly and firmly.

Myth. I can't get pregnant.

Facts. Typically because of guilt feelings about sex, many sexually active teenagers make no (or inadequate) attempts at contraception. This myth is based on the lack of factual information plus the use of denial (unconsciously refusing to see a stressful situation) as a defense against anxiety. As may occur with driving, drugs or pregnancy, many adolescents have an illusion of invulnerability. Although it may happen to others, "it won't happen to me." In contrast, some unconsciously want a pregnancy — as proof of maculinity or femininity, desire for adult status, revenge toward parents or a former lover, or a fantasy that a baby will fulfill their need to be loved.

Myth. Condoms allow no feelings.

Facts. Many sexually active teenagers are resistant to using condoms (rubbers) for birth control. This is primarily true for those who have never used condoms. The younger boys listen to the older boys, mimic their words, and come to believe that "real men" are not supposed to like condoms. The reality is that they detract somewhat from the man's physical stimulation, but not from the woman's. However, anything that is perceived psychologically as unpleasurable (including condoms) can reduce the satisfaction in any interaction. Even so, this relates more to expectations of the situation rather than the physical effects of the condom. As an added feature, the latex condom (used correctly) is the best protection against sexually transmitted diseases — including AIDS — outside of abstaining from sex.

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